Miss Manners: I befriended a spiteful oversharer

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Over the past year, I built a friendship with one of my co-workers in a very prestigious organization. We are both in our 50s. She can be hyper-verbal at times. She started volunteering information about many things -- her salary, her poor upbringing, her marital details, her husband’s personal habits, her spirituality preferences, etc. -- hoping, I believe, that I would do the same.

It was a bit overwhelming, and started getting annoying when she began dissecting every statement I made. She would question me multiple times regarding the who, what, when, how and why about events and people that were completely irrelevant to her.

I finally snapped when she got too inquisitive about a confidential issue. I told her to please not ask me so many questions as it makes me anxious. I categorically stated that what I do in my house is my business, and vice versa.

I think I hurt her feelings, and now she will not talk to me. She openly ignores me in our office. I approached her once, hoping we could talk about it, and she did not even listen to me. I sent a happy text message a few days later, to which she did not respond.

Her behavior seems extremely childish to me. I am not sure what I did here, except put a stop to some annoying, unnecessary inquisitions. What do I do now?

GENTLE READER: One would have thought it became annoying when she started sharing personal information at work.

Miss Manners does not mean to appear unsympathetic, but when she tells you that it is time to get back to work, she is doing that so that you hear it from her, rather than from your boss at this prestigious organization.

Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.

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